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Harveylives
11-26-2003, 04:24 PM
Want to try the 'Orgasmatron'?
From correspondents in Paris
November 27, 2003

US doctors are casting around for female volunteers to test an 'Orgasmatron', an implanted device that will trigger instant ecstasy, the weekly British magazine New Scientist reports in next Saturday's issue.

The innovation was accidentally discovered more than two years ago, when a surgeon conducted a routine pain-relief operation on a woman.

The procedure entails inserting two electrodes into the spine and applying tiny pulses of electricity.

Patients are conscious throughout the operation so that they can say when they feel less pain.

In this case, the woman had a spontaneous orgasm, and that prompted the surgeon, pain specialist Stuart Meloy, to take the idea further.

He found that it worked so well for women who had chronic sex problems that he patented it as a possible treatment for female sexual dysfunction.

He has now received approval from the US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to test a $US13,000 ($18,150) orgasm-giving device about the size of a heart pacemaker.

In the first stage of the trial, wires connected to a battery pack are inserted through the skin and into the woman's spinal cord, a procedure that Meloy says is no riskier than having an epidural.

In the second stage, a self-contained device will be implanted beneath the skin and can be switched on and off with a remote control.

So far only one woman has completed the first stage of the trial, and another is about to be signed up. Eight more are needed.

"I thought people would be beating my door down to be part of the trial," a disappointed Meloy told New Scientist. "But so far I am struggling to find people."

Meloy's approach has run into hostility among some sex therapists, who say sexual dysfunction in women is usually caused by psychological factors and point to "non-invasive" methods, such as a vibrator, for providing an orgasm.

Agence France-Presse

LiLOrion
11-26-2003, 05:04 PM
Originally posted by Harveylives
In the second stage, a self-contained device will be implanted beneath the skin and can be switched on and off with a remote control.

Oh the fun that would ensue if fido decides to play with the remote.

Or, the remote starts to have a mind of its own and just turns on and off arbitarily, my TV remote does that at times.

Would it set off a metal detector...try explaining THAT one at the airport.

BlackThorn
11-26-2003, 05:05 PM
I can see vengeful partners getting a hold of the remote and setting it off in inconvenient places.

Kurt_eh
11-26-2003, 05:09 PM
Vengeful? I'd think the ladies would have to worry more about the practical jokers! :D

BlackThorn
11-26-2003, 05:11 PM
Well, it'd suck if it started going off during say . . . the interview for that promotion you've been hoping for. :D

Third EYe
11-26-2003, 05:12 PM
Or...

witchdoctor
11-26-2003, 05:41 PM
So why is it that it only works for women?

LiLOrion
11-26-2003, 06:11 PM
Originally posted by witchdoctor
So why is it that it only works for women?

Cause the men's would be too messy. ;)

And, because after they are "finished" most men just collapse where ever they are and immediately fall asleep or dont move for 30 minutes. That wouldnt be particularly good if your trying to cross the street and your orgasmatron goes off. :D

witchdoctor
11-26-2003, 06:17 PM
Originally posted by LiLOrion
Cause the men's would be too messy. ;)

And, because after they are "finished" most men just collapse where ever they are and immediately fall asleep or dont move for 30 minutes. That wouldnt be particularly good if your trying to cross the street and your orgasmatron goes off. :D

:spew: :lol :lol :lol
okay, I guess I can't argue with that.

LiLOrion
11-26-2003, 06:23 PM
Men also have Viagra and Levitra and the soon to be released Cialis, and they have auto-inflate implants and MUSE injections...they dont need no stinking Orgasmatron! :)

Now, my question is, will insurance cover it? :)

witchdoctor
11-26-2003, 06:35 PM
Originally posted by LiLOrion
Men also have Viagra and Levitra and the soon to be released Cialis, and they have auto-inflate implants and MUSE injections...they dont need no stinking Orgasmatron! :)


Sure, there is viagra and the others, but they are no gaurantee. Just because you have a rifle doesn't mean you are actually going to bag a deer. :D

Mrelia
11-26-2003, 07:08 PM
:rollin:

LiLOrion
11-27-2003, 06:11 AM
Originally posted by witchdoctor
Sure, there is viagra and the others, but they are no gaurantee. Just because you have a rifle doesn't mean you are actually going to bag a deer. :D


Yes, but I'm sure they have a lot of fun "testing" the various methods I listed above. :D

And you never know, some men might just live for the hunting and not the bagging...yeah right! :rollin:




OT: Do hunters really BAG deer? I always see them throwing them over the hood of the car and stuff. :)

witchdoctor
11-27-2003, 01:27 PM
Originally posted by LiLOrion
Yes, but I'm sure they have a lot of fun "testing" the various methods I listed above. :D

And you never know, some men might just live for the hunting and not the bagging...yeah right! :rollin:

Yes, all you need is your rifle and you can do it alone. I guess you could call it target practice. You just have to remember to clean your rifle afterwards. :D


Originally posted by LiLOrion
OT: Do hunters really BAG deer? I always see them throwing them over the hood of the car and stuff. :)

Well actually, I guess it is the rifle that hunters bag, if they are responsible.

grinner
11-27-2003, 07:41 PM
this has taken a very wrong turn... double speak is a wonderful thing.

Sunderflame
11-27-2003, 07:48 PM
Where can I get one..I'll just wear that remote out. I hope it has a lifetime warranty..
http://www.emotipad.com/newemoticons/Lovehearts.gif
http://www.emotipad.com/newemoticons/PLove.gif
http://www.emotipad.com/newemoticons/Sex.gif

LiLOrion
11-28-2003, 05:46 AM
Originally posted by grinner
this has taken a very wrong turn... double speak is a wonderful thing.

Yeah and I'll never look at rifles the same way again. :)

Sunderflame
11-28-2003, 10:17 AM
Now when I work out in my recreation room I have this deers' glass eyes staring at me.
I had the head mounted...So I still want that thingymajig I was refering to in the orignal post...hahahah guys. Cleaning your guns is so damn laborious.
http://www.emotipad.com/newemoticons/ChuckBall.gif

trubador
11-28-2003, 01:35 PM
:scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble: :scramble:

zelbinion
11-28-2003, 02:18 PM
I wonder if you could clone the remotes like they use to clone cell phones and garage door openers. Just drive down the neighborhood pushing the button (no pun there) and see what happens